Inconsequential New Years Resolution #1

Dialog:

• Port:
  • Inconsequential New Years Resolution #1: Be the "world's most" at something.
  • People in the world's happiest place can be happy about their location.
  • The world's coolest person has a record he could mention at cocktail parties (but never will).
  • Even the world's most dangerous place has something.
• Starboard:
  • You are one of the world's most existent people.
• Port:
  • resolution 1...done